My Organized Chaos Life: The Newest News

Well most of you who keep up on here know that I am a busy person. Some know that I am struggling in life and some know that I am also happy. Many don't know the full story, all don't know the whole detail. I am a person of not being afraid to tell anyone anything that they want to know...but I will let you know when I don't want to go into full detail. But there are just some things that just have to be in full detail for people to imagine what I am going through. This blog helps me out with that and that's what I love about some of you people who comment on anything and give me good remarks or even advice, I do take in affect and take in your advice...I won't follow it all the time to be honest.

Getting back on task I do have to say that the last two weeks with getting to know Andrew [yes this is my newest boyfriend and we are not making any big moves until we both have the same answer] has been the best two weeks ever. I love how he understands me and how I can understand him as well. I will not lie and tell you that I honestly meet him online and yes I was careful when I first started talking to him. Once I got comfortable with him was when I got the connection that both of us felt instantly. But if most of you are thinking that I may be going to fast...I disagree because we do have a distance in the relationship, we are both working on giving each other our full 100% trust but I know he's different then all my other exes because he doesn't push me and is willing to wait when I am ready.

The site that I meet Andrew on was OkCupid. A friend of mine had told me about the site when I had left my ex but I wasn't in any mood at the time to start jumping into anything until I knew that I needed to prove to myself that it was time. Had it been my ex that broke up with me I may have not joined the site within a month but because I left him and I knew that it was time for me to move on, I am glad that the night I joined OkCupid was the night I meet Andrew! Why? I wouldn't be happy today if I didn't join the site! Back on topic again, I get a message from Andrew and we start talking. We connect instantly and ask each other out. We both say yes and continue to talk on the phone each day.

Remember how I said I like to be honest, well I won't lie and say that we haven't talked about the future or even given each other support on trying to get back into college or finding better jobs!! Cause we have and actually are. Since my knee went out plus with talking to Andrew and really being able to connect with God again [yes I said it I have found my relationship back with God with getting together with Andrew] plus with me going back to college that it be time for me to seek a better stable part-time job while going back to school. Well this is were the support from Andrew is coming in great.

I don't quite remembering talking about my "short" employment with Primerica but I was employed by them and recently thought about giving it another try but didn't have the support about a month ago that I do now! Well little did I not know that my aunt [who I am very close to] just hired into that company and she wants to get me back into there!! I told Andrew that I have even given it thought and heard my mother tell my aunt that she would support me [and I am sure she would as long as I listened to what needed to be done]. Well Tuesday I am going to the opportunity meeting to talk it over with my RVP and even the people who may support me [and most of them already do] about setting up a way to help me out with getting this back in line. So I am hoping that things go good with Primerica because I may be back with working with them. So this is the next big step I have made since leaving my ex [having Andrew along for the right is just a plus plus plus].

Another great thing [even though I signed up for the classes before meeting Andrew] is that I am going back to college at Monroe County Community College at the end of the month. I am majoring in Media Arts and minoring in Business. This semester I am two credits shy of being full-time but next semester [Winter 2010] I may end up going full-time. My class schedule is as follows: POLSC 151 Introduction to Political Science, Monday and Wednesday's 2-3:25p; CIS 130 Introduction to Computers, Monday and Wednesday's 5-6:55p; and MATH 121 Technical Math, Monday and Wednesday's 7-8:55p. Classes start August 30 and go to December 13th. Andrew fully supports me and is glad to see that I am going to college to do something that I love. He himself is also a college student!

But not only do I have things to look forward to, I also have my hardships in which Andrew is seeing all the stress that they are causing me. Not only am I not bringing home any income he understands that I hate it and that its pain and a knee problem that is causing me to not work. When I went to the hoedown I ended up popping out me knee, being off for a month and having no pain. Well I went back for two weeks and ended up popping my knee out again. The doctor tells me that I have dislocated my knee cap and that the pain may always be there. Funny thing about that is that he asked me what I did then he asked me, "Are you looking for new employment?" I did give him my honest answer which just so happen to be a yes. This is just more details as to why I am seeking back employment to Primerica.

Not only am I going through the hardship with my knee but my ex is starting to cause me trouble...okay causing trouble may not be the right way to describe it. Its more hurt because he is not living up to his part of the deal since getting all his things back because I was stupidly caringly willingly gave him stuff back without getting the thing that meaned the most to me...MY DIGNITY!!! So since I have something that needs to be paid by him, and given back by him...I'm gonna make him wish he wouldn't have cheated on me. Better yet there are things I know that I am not in any position to tell him but I know that he''s not no better then what he seems. [*Note* It does hurt me to say that I honestly don't see friendship between him and I but I just can't because he just isn't the same person I knew].

With all these emotion, yes this has all been going through my mind, I have to say that with meeting Andrew and Andrew giving me all the support that things are getting better and with having him in my life just makes me this happy as well as him, I'm not wanting the feeling to end. I honestly can't tell you the last time I've felt like this but I have to say that it has been honestly a good 8+ years and I don't want the feeling to end. So even if I take my relationship at a speed that is good for me...please just be happy. If you want to give your advice I won't stop you, I welcome it. Whether I listen...well that will just have to be another blog!

Caught in Organized Chaos

First of all I would like to take the time to all of those who support me, love me, care for me, and keep up with this site!! Without you all I probably still wouldn't be doing this. Even if there aren't much I think that this site is a potential and that is why I do not stop doing what I do best: blog, review, and just be me! Another thing I would like to say is that I have found a title for the site that is catchy and I love it! The new name is: Caught in Organized Chaos. I choose that one because it fits me. I have all this stuff on this page and it's all in an organized chaos!!

On another note I would also like to update you all on things that is going on with me. I'm not sure if I had told you all that I left Chris, but I did. Yeah things were going okay a few months ago but it was after the tornado hit in Dundee when I started getting a weird feeling. My feeling was then again was hit hard when Chris stopped me from doing something that shouldn't have been a problem. Once he pissed me off the last time I knew it was time for me to just leave, so I went to my parents, talked to my mom and then went back and left him. Things have been much better and easier for me since I left him.

About two weeks ago I meet Andrew! We have so much in common and care for each other that its not funny. We both are working, going to college and trying to focus on our future, yet finding time to fit each other into our lives...so far its working great and continues to get better each time. We both understand each other and that is what I have been looking for in a guy! I'm happy and continue to be made happy!!

Usher: Raymond v Raymond

Usher
Raymond v Raymond
$10.99 (iTunes)
R&B/Soul
Track Listing:
1. Monstar
2. Hey Daddy (Daddy's Home) ft. Piles
3. There Goes My Baby
4. Lil' Freak ft. Nikki Minaj
5. She Don't Know ft. Ludacris
6. OMG ft. will.i.am
7. Mars vs. Venus
8. Pro Lover
9. Foolin' Around
10. Papers
11. So Many Girls
12. Guilty ft. T.I
13. Okay
14. Making Love (Into the Night)
15. More
*****
This has to be the best Usher album that I have listened to since I've listened to Usher. With it containing my favorite song "OMG ft. will.i.am" with the top 2 tie of "There Goes My Baby" and "Lil' Freak ft. Nikki Minaj" I would have to say that Usher has done it again! I am looking forward to more Usher because he just keeps getting better and better!!

The Gift of Life

Jacky felt like dying, no one understood the pain that she was going through. Jacky had just been in a terrible car accident two years ago that had claimed the life of her dear friend Alan and almost claiming hers. She also had several medical problems since she entered middle school. She’s a survivor of cancer and she’s bipolar. Everyone knew that she had to be in a special house for the impaired. Though she wasn’t a danger to the world, she had to be there for her safety. Besides from being manic depressant, she is active in youth group.

Just recently she’d gone to a youth rally were the other youth groups that were from the same based church, meaning that it was a “assembly of god” church, met and made Speed the Light (S.T.L.) goals. Well, the last year she’d made a goal of $800 and actually raised $1,000. So this year she figured that she’d double her goal to $1,600. Though the problem was, she’d have to sacrifice a lot of things, but she was the girl that couldn’t sacrifice anything. Why?

Well, there’s nothing wrong with her parents. There bloody rich, but they don’t believe in God and they disowned her the day she started going to church. The only people that she called family were her boyfriend Kevin, her youth group, and the people that she lived with. What’s wrong with the parents that she lives with? Well, they’d give her the money in a heartbeat, but she didn’t want to get all the money from them in one payment. She’d want other people to help out. So she got this great idea, she’d share her story of how she was involved in the wreck.

This is her story:
“Almost about this time 3 years ago, I was involved in a car wreck with my ex-fiancé Alan. Alan was a part of my youth group that I’m in now. He believed in helping the missionaries so bad that he’d make this big goal every year, he wanted to make $2,500. Though a year before he died we’d decided to get married shortly after we graduated and got degrees in what we wanted to succeed in. Well, that then put us to put our goals together. He’d raise $2,500 and I’d raise $2,500. This of course would equal $5,000.

“Well, we decided that instead of being procrastinators we would get moving right away. So after we were done, and on our way home from the rally, we called the local radio station and told them that we wanted to raise five thousand dollars for S.T.L. and that we needed the public’s help. Well, every time we’d listen we’d hear an advertisement about us. Well, within weeks we received almost 100 grand. But that wasn’t it, it kept growing. By time a year was done we’d raise over 1.5 million dollars. Higher then any one for S.T.L.

“Well, a couple weeks before we had a S.T.L. Youth Rally we were invited to Washington D.C. to receive an award for raising the most money for church. It was an honor. Though, of course it was winter and there was a drunk on the road, the drunk had collided with the car I was in and smashed it and left my fiancé smashed between me and the other car; we both were fighting breath. I figured that we would both die but that I would be first. I could feel me bleeding from my heart but I didn’t know that it was minor.

“Alan started gasping for breath big time. Before he died he said eight last words, ‘Remember me when you are in the hospital.’ Then the next thing I know he died. I don’t even remember the ride to the hospital or anything because I feel asleep when Alan died. When I woke up I was told that he’d died in the hospital instead of in the car. He’d just fallen in a coma when I feel asleep. They said that I was lucky to be alive. An hour longer and I’d be dead along with Alan. They told me that they found that that I had an early diagnosis of lung cancer and that I’d be able to have surgery and not worry about dying or chemotherapy.

“I told them to go ahead. Within months I was able to go home. I still received my award and my real parents even came and visited me after I got out of the hospital. I told them that I didn’t want to see or talk to them because they weren’t always there when I needed them. My adoptive parents even told them to get out of the house. My youth group even was proud that they told me not to make a goal because I needed to concentrate on other stuff. The other stuff that I didn’t know about was a mystery, but I pulled through. I survived cancer and a car wreck that took the life of my love. I’m a walking miracle.

“With the money that Alan and I ended up earning bought missionaries what they needed. Then I heard that while I was in the hospital a local new station did a charity for me and they earned over 2 million dollars. That covered what I needed when I was in the hospital. Now I’m alive and doing well. I ended up finding a new love of my life and finding my dreams in live. All I ask is for one favor…

“…Donate for Speed the Light.”
The Gift of Life is ©2005

Avenged Sevenfold: Nightmare

Avenged Sevenfold
Nightmare
$12.99 (iTunes)
Rock
Track Listing:
1. Nightmare
2. Welcome to the Family
3. Danger Line
4. Buried Alive
5. Natural Born Killer
6. So Far Away
7. God Hate Us
8. Victim
9. Tonight the Word Dies
10. Fiction
11. Save Me
12. Lost It All (Non-Album Track)
****
Avenged Sevenfold has gone and done it again! With the album being newly released I have to say that there are good song so far on this album that has had me in curiosity since I knew that it was coming out. My favorite track on the album has to be "Nightmare" followed by "Buried Alive" only because I see were the lyrics are coming from. With much anticipation in hopes that this one would be better than the last two albums from the band I have to say that it is a 4 star album in my eyes.